This Has Been On My Mind

"So we make our choices but darlin there was never any choice...we listen to their voices we ignore OUR OWN voice...and when the people who gather around you do you remember that they were the most cruel...and when they ask will you be my sister...brother...sister...brother of the moon she says no baby no."







This quote was taken from a live performance of Sisters Of The Moon by Fleetwood Mac. I found an good interpretation of the lyrics. These interpretations are how I have been feeling about certain things for a very long time. Here are some excerpts from the interpretation.




"She asked me-- Be my sister,"

"Stevie is looking for a real friend. She needs to count on someone."

"The 'cruel people' mentioned are the fans, the public. In some way they love Stevie, but since they ask her for more and more, they are also cruel to her. And she tries never to dissapoint them.

Besides,nobody knows her closely.

None of those fans are actually her friends. She has no one so she has to rely on herself.

Nobody likes her for who she really is. Does anybody know (her name) who she really is?"

"This song is about those nightmares she has to fight with."

I know this song talks about the pitfalls of fame, but some of the interpretations express some of how I have been feeling about things for a very long time (in bold italic type). I only write this as a cleansing tool. It does not reflect my current state of mind which is peaceful as I write. It continously amazes me how her lyrics speak to my soul. Of course the circumstances are diffrent but the emotions and feelings felt are the same.

"I Can See Past You To The White Sands"

"It means that I'm really trying to get over something, and though I'm freaked out about it I'm looking to the green ocean and can see past all of these problems to the incredibly beautiful white sand and the ocean beyond it. I'm gonna be OK because I am movin' past you."



The title of the post is from Bombay Sapphires, a song on Stevie Nick's last solo record Trouble in Shangri-La (May 2001).




As most of you know I have been dealing with an most unpleasant situation. It has gone from bad to worse. Certain people have felt it necessary to involve children in the adult war. I find that kind of behavior despicable beyond words! Certain people have also felt it necessary to push my buttons and play childhood games. I will tell this person; I have had enough! It escapes me that adults my age continue to act like petulant children when they have adult responsibilities like holding down jobs and family responsibilites.

What I've done to deal with this is I wrote the involved parties letters expressing my anger, pain and outrage. I have been obssessing over this enough! It is time to cut it lose and move on with my life. These letters will NEVER be sent because I wrote them to heal my soul. I found many years ago in therapy that it is a very useful tool. I can't begin to express my feelings of relief, peace and joy. I feel that a huge burden has been lifted from my soul.



I will use another quote from the song to tell EVERYBODY what is contained in the letters.



It is blue...it is not about YOU...it is ALL true


I have just one more thing to say to the involved parties: "I'm gonna be OK because I'm movin' past YOU".